What we do without thinking is a great indicator of the condition of our heart. Like the old adage says, what spills out of your cup when it’s bumped reveals much about who you are on the inside. Yesterday, I had an occasion to experience what I have dubbed the Nash Rambler Road Test. During my morning commute, my cup was bumped, and let’s just say that the Holy Ghost wasn’t the only thing that spilled out.
I did not sin, but what I learned about my heart caused me to repent of selfish pride and a me-first attitude.
Here’s what happened:
I was driving east on Army Trail Road, enjoying the beautiful sun-lit sky and worshiping God. My morning commute is normally an hour long, so I often have meaningful dialogue with God on my way to work. Except today, instead of envisioning him sitting next to me in my car and chatting with him like He was my best friend, I was worshiping Him.
I worshippedHismagnificence!
I worshipped His greatness!
I toldGod that He was so big He could spin the earth on His pinky finger. I was giddy with joyful adoration as I basked in God’s heavenly glow.
“Oh Adonai,” I gushed. “How amazing you are and how grateful I am to know you! I am so insignificant, and you are so majestic. I am a ball of dirt. And you are the all powerful El Shaddai. There is none like you! There is none beside you! You hung the stars in place and know the names of every person that is driving alongside me today. You know where they are going and what they are doing. More importantly, you know their heart and their eternal destination. Oh Father, you are so amazing!”
God’s sweet presence rushed into my car. It was glorious! My heart felt so light, so jubilant.
And then it happened.
I turned on my right turn signal to change lanes, and the guy next to me sped up. I sped up more. Then he did too. I needed to change lanes so that I could exit onto 355 South and swing over to Roosevelt toshave about 15 minutes off my commute. But the guy in the white Dodge Charger who was engaging me didn’t care. He was focused on not letting me get in front of him so he could press onto the 355 North ramp.
We were engaging in a Nash Rambler Experience:
While riding in my Cadillac
What to my surprise
A little Nash Rambler was following me
About one third my size
The guy musta wanted to pass me up
As he kept on tooting his horn
I’ll show him that a Cadillac is not a car to scorn
Beep beep beep beep
His horn went beep beep beep
I pushed my foot down to the floor
To give the guy the shake…
Soon we were going ninety
Musta left him in the dust…
Now we were doing a hundred and ten
This certainly was a race…
(The Playmates circa 1960)
I finally relented, slowed down, and let the Dodge Charger pass me so that I could navigate onto the ramp. After merginginto traffic and gettingpast the tollbooth, I started praying again.Basically I said “Okay Lord where were we?” But He was gone.The overwhelming sense of His presence had left my car.
Instantaneously, conviction set in.
How could I have been so full of joy and love one minute and battling with a stranger on the road the next?
In less than 60 seconds, I had gone from the throne room to the flesh pit.
Uncanny, isn’t it? We can be all bubbly and flowing in God’s spirit and all the while there can be a selfishness within us that we aren’t fully aware of. As I said at the beginning of this post, we discover much about the condition of our heart when our cup gets bumped.
Needless to say, I spent the rest of my commute repenting. When I realized how prideful my Nash Rambler Engagement was, I was seriously ashamed of myself.
To be Christ-like means to be as servant.Doesn’t that also mean being a servant while driving? For me it does. I have enough battles with my pride and self-will that I don’t need to be pushing my way around on the road – or anywhere else for that matter.
It is humbling to tell you of my experience. Especially to those who know me as “Sister Goff, Assistant Pastor’s Wife,” or “Debbie, the Bible Study Teacher”. But, I have learned that there is something very healthy about confessing your faults to one other. Yes, wisdom must be exercised when doing so. But in many cases, just the humbling of yourself to another human being remindsyou [and me] that we are all just balls of dirt loved by a merciful and gracious Creator.
Let’s Pray:
Oh Jesus, forgive us of all of our faults and foibles. Forgive us for self-will. For selfishness. For our me-first attitudes. And help us, remind us, Lord, of who we are in You. Enable us to do better in our homes, on our jobs, and especially on the road. In Your Name, Amen.
“Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” (James 5:16)