Second Fiddle

The great apostle Paul instructed the church in Rome to “practice playing second fiddle” (Romans 12:10, The Message)
Practice playing second fiddle…

Another translation of this same verse says to outdo one another in showing honor… (ESV)

And still another translation says Give each other more honor than you want for yourselves…(NCV)
Imagine, intentionally choosing to let someone else receive all of the attention and accolades that would normally go to you. And for your heart to be in such a place that you actually preferred it that way.

What Second Fiddle Looks Like

So what does a life as second fiddle look like? Here are just a few possibilities:

  • To always offer the spot in the grocery line ahead of you – no matter how busy or rushed you are.
  • In rush hour traffic, when someone is trying to cut in front of you, to gleefully let them.
  • To let a coworker receive all the credit for the project that you did most of the work on.
  • To sincerely rejoice when someone gets chosen for that prime position at work, in your rotary club, or at church.

That’s a pretty tall order for us selfish humans. So often we want to be first… be noticed…be in charge…receive credit. Yet the Holy Bible tells us that Christ’s way is just the opposite.

One of my favorite admonitions in the Holy Bible is found in Romans 12:16:
“Make friends with nobodies; don’t be the great somebody.” (The Messsage)
…don’t be the great somebody.

We have all known people who seemed to view themselves as the great somebody haven’t we? They are cocky, prideful, demand great attention, and seem not to notice the needs of others.

And, if we are honest, we will acknowledge that we have been in situations where we felt as if we were the great somebody.

Oh, you may feign humility and say that your self-image is too low to see yourself as great anything. But if you really search your heart, and memory bank, you will remember times when jealousy or feelings of being slighted affected you.

Those times were Great Somebody Moments. And Great Somebody Moments are rooted in pride.

(I wrote about the dangers of pride in a previous post if you’d like to read it. <<CLICK HERE>>)

Dealing With The Great Somebody Moments

My Great Somebody Moments tend to come either when I am feeling slighted by someone I really want attention from, or in the form of jealousy. There’s an old song by the Kingsmen Quartet that clearly reveals this very common Great Somebody Moment:

“Well, the sermons they’re too long. And, maybe, they’re too short.
He ought to preach the word with dignity instead of “stomp and snort.” Well, that preacher we’ve got must be “the world’s most stuck up man.” Well, one of the lady’s told me the other day, “Well, he didn’t even shake my hand.”
…he didn’t even shake my hand…
How many times has a Great Somebody Moment reared up in us because someone didn’t shake our hand?
There are many examples that could be shared of Great Somebody Moments that press within us, but none is so common as that feeling of being slighted by someone we care about.
Whether at work, in our family, neighborhood, or church. To feel ignored or discounted strikes at the deepest level of our sense of self-worth. And yet the Lord Jesus Christ clearly instructs us in His Holy word to not let it bother us. To grow in Him to such a place that all that matters to us is His attention and favor. To enjoy playing second fiddle.
The Holy Bible give us clear instruction on what to do when we are hurt by somebody else’s Great Somebody Moment. We are to pray for them, bless them, do good to them.
“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. “Whoever hits you on the cheek, offer him the other also; and whoever takes away your coat, do not withhold your shirt from him either.…” (Matthew 6:27-29)
What works for me is to take this verse perhaps to a deeper, more practical level.
Whenever I am feeling hurt or frustrated because of someone else’s behavior, and I feel a Great Somebody Moment rearing up within me, I stop right then and pray every imaginable blessing on the individual I can. Including asking God to expand their influence and talent beyond their wildest imaginations.
For example, if I am feeling upset because my coworker is getting more favor and attention than I am and will probably get promoted instead of me; I nip that Great Somebody Moment in the bud by praying specifically that God will give them that promotion and bless them in it and let them shine even more.
Is this type of praying easy? No. And especially not so when the emotional connection to the person is deep or the hurts and frustrations have been many. But it has been the only way that I have found that I can whack away at the root of the great somebody in me and move into the joy and contentment that Christ wants me to have as second fiddle.
What about you? What joy have you had in playing second fiddle? What challenges have you faced in dealing with the Great Somebody within you?

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